Need a bit of sex education? That's what The Fetish Academy is for!
It's Princess Cosplay's mission to create a judgement free community where anyone can feel welcome to discover new and exciting sources of pleasure, excitement, and fun. To do this, it's important for everyone to understand everything they can about their bodies, each others' bodies, and what they'll be exploring on their own or together.
Asking for Sex - Consent
The way you ask for sex will likely, and should, depend on the circumstances of your situation. Whether you use a direct approach or a slower subtle approach, someone will be much more likely to agree if you are respectful, and even if they don’t, respect will still take you a long way. It’s important to understand that people are not sex objects; they have equal choice as you in participating in the sex.
When you ask another person for sex, you are asking them to take a risk. If they say no, it doesn’t necessarily indicate that they don’t like you. There are many reasons that a person may decide against getting intimately involved in any particular moment. If you respectfully and kindly accept their decision not to have sex in that moment, you stand a much better chance of getting lucky with them at a later date. After all, you’ve planted the seed and shown that you can be mature, friendly, and graceful in the face of adversity, which many people find very sexy.
When they say yes, it’s important to discuss what each of you has in mind. This part takes practice, too. Since there are countless ways to have sex or be intimate, being on the same page before you start getting hot and heavy will be the first step to prevent over-stepping any personal boundaries. Communication is the most important key to becoming the amazing lover you were born to be. And to become a successful communicator takes practice, practice, practice. When in doubt, communicate more than you think is necessary.
About the Clitoris
The clitoris is often the most sexually sensitive part of the vagina. The clitoris, like the head of the penis, contains numerous concentrated bundles of nerve endings that respond gratifyingly to touch and other types of stimulation.
A little known fact about the clitoris is that the sensitive clitoral tissue is not just the flesh that is externally visible; the clitoris has 18 anatomical parts. The portion of the clitoris that one can see is just the very beginning of what’s sensitive, while most of the volume of the clitoris lies beneath the surface.
The clitoris and its surrounding nerve endings extend into a much larger area. In fact, some G-spot stimulation and anal stimulation, for women, may be in part due to the many nerve endings associated with clitoris. Beyond the visible clitoris, the clitoral shaft separates into two legs that extend for about three inches on both sides of the vaginal opening. Similar to the penis, the entire clitoris consists of erectile tissue; this means that during sexual arousal this tissue fills with blood and becomes stiff and sensitive.
Most people with vaginas are unable to achieve orgasm with penetrative vaginal stimulation alone. Therefore, understanding the clitoris is often the key to orgasm and sexual satisfaction for most people with vaginas. Each person likes different types of clitoral stimulation.
Some people like direct stimulation like touching the clitoris, which you can do in a number of ways: head on with a finger, a palm, a tongue, a toy etc. Some prefer indirect stimulation like touching the area around the clitoris or touching the clitoris through the clitoral hood. Some people like gentle caressing while others desire more pressure. Some like clitoral stimulation to be slow while others like it fast and firm.
The best way to know how to clitorally please someone is to ask them to give you feedback. If you listen, follow directions, and practice you can learn quite a lot while making your lover wonderfully happy.
While the clitoris is the sexual hub of the universe for many, it usually requires a bit of preparation to get aroused for digital or oral manipulation.
Teasing and gentle petting is a great way to start off stimulating the clitoris. You may wish to start off gentle—kissing their inner thighs and continue your explorations from there.
Many adore licking and nibbling the other surfaces of the pussy. Go slowly and think fun. Since it’s hard to have a verbal conversation when you are eating pussy, you can refer to the body language: whimpers and moans, etc. for feedback.
Direct clitoral stimulation is divine for some, and others prefer indirect stimulation of the clitoris, while others enjoy having the clitoris sucked. Indirect clitoral stimulation can be achieved by stroking your tongue through the channels on either side of the clitoral hood and applying pressure to the clit through the hood.
While each one of these can individually give pleasure, a combination of all of these techniques, and other techniques that are uniquely yours, can give even more pleasure. Afterward, ask for feedback and listen to their responses if you want to be the greatest lover possible.
About Penis Size
It’s a very common misconception, and unnecessarily widely held fear, that large penises rule the world of sexual happiness. In the reality of biology, 90% of erect penises measure 5-7 inches in length, and 1-2 inches in diameter. If you're concerned that your penis is “too small,” you can rest assured that you are in good company. Our media and culture tell us that bigger is better in every aspect of life. But that can’t be true of all things, especially when it comes down to tools. For a moment, think of your penis as a tool. If you’re considering it to be too small, what is it too small for? Just like different tasks require different tools, many people prefer different penis sizes for different activities. Some people say they like large ones for oral sex, medium ones for vaginal sex, and small ones for anal sex; of course this is just one specific opinion, others have preferences in the exact opposite direction and everything in between. Some people may like the sensation of fullness that a larger penis can provide for that specific person, and for pleasuring those people there are many ways to achieve this sensation. For hundreds of ideas, just check out our catalog.
For some people, penis size doesn’t matter at all. In surveys about what people want in a lover, findings indicate that most people are looking for qualities like interpersonal connection with their partner, their partner's attention and sensitivity to their body, and the ability to respond to their individual needs. So if you want to please your partner, take time to learn about your partner's body and find out what moves them. Take a load of worry off your pecker and just love it, it stands to bring you some of the best pleasure you’ve ever known.
It's common to not have a full erection sometimes. This is true for every penis. It's especially common in a situation that is new, exciting or stressful, like being with a new partner, for example. Having a fear of erection problems can often result in an erection problem. Take your time with your new partners, and have patience. Being sexually comfortable with a new partner often takes time; try being naked and touching each other for a longer period of time. Payoffs are greatly improved by this method for all parties involved. Slow deep conscious breathing can help send a message to your body and your brain to relax. Not to mention, there are lots of fun things to do while you’re waiting for hard wood.
About the G-Spot
The G-spot is the spongy and ridged area on the front wall of the vagina. It is loaded with nerve endings and is an erogenous zone for many people. This being said, not everyone finds stimulation of this area pleasant.
The G-spot can best be located by inserting one or more fingers two to three inches into the vagina and stroking towards the front of the body with what’s usually called the "come hither" motion. Some vaginas require quite a bit of pressure, and lubricant can be helpful for applying pressure without irritating tissue. When pleasuring your partner, you may or may not feel anything you can identify as a G- Spot, so rely on your partner's feedback to find your way. Most people with vaginas are more likely to find G- Spot stimulation pleasurable after they are already aroused. Of those who greatly enjoy this type of stimulation, some experience an ejaculation of fluid upon orgasm or as part of arousal. This fluid is a product of the paraurethral sponge. It is clear and odorless, and contrary to many people’s belief is not urine.
About the Prostate Gland
By the penis, there is a sensitive internal tissue called the prostate gland, which can be extremely stimulating. It can be stimulated most directly through the anus. This stimulation is pleasurable for anyone with a prostate (if you’re a cisgendered straight man, don’t shy away, you’ll be surprised how great it feels!). This gland produces a fluid that helps produce semen, and it closes the urine duct to allow for the safe passage of sperm. The prostate can be found a few inches inside the opening of the anus, and can be stimulated through the rectal wall. When the prostate is stimulated, some can orgasm whether or not they have an erection.
Assuming for now that they’re on their back, slip a finger or two into the anus facing upward then curl your fingers (what some people describe as the "come hither" motion). Many claim they like the prostate stroked or massaged.
When you stimulate the prostate by hand, be sure your nails are trimmed. The anus is a sensitive body cavern that can tear and scrape easily. It's not as durable for penetration as the vagina. You may want to snap a latex glove on your hand, found in many drug stores or sex shops, which will make rear entry a smoother process. There are also finger cots you can purchase that serve the same purpose. In addition, don't forget the lube (store bought or spit). The anus doesn't naturally secrete slippery, sexual fluids conducive to easy gliding.
Fingers aren't the only anal pleasure enhancers. You can try butt plugs, vibrators, dildos or, of course, 100% nature-made penises if that turns you on. Use your imagination on which toys you can buy, adapt, or make. If you use a toy, make sure it has a flange. A flange is a base that prevents the anus from devouring your toy, which would make it hard to expunge without medical services. The anus is a powerful internal mechanism that can work as a mighty suction device.
Another thing to remember about prostrate stimulation is that it’s not necessarily for everyone. Some find it irritating and painful. Some really enjoy light pressure, while others prefer it hard. Some like constant pressure, and some like a fast "pulsing" motion. Some love the sensation, but only like it once they are already very aroused. Again, the best way to ensure that they’re enjoying it is constant communication!
About Getting Pregnant
A pregnancy only occurs when sperm meets egg, so a woman cannot become pregnant from kissing, oral sex, mutual masturbation, or sharing a hot tub. It is possible for someone to become pregnant if you use the “pull out” method (taking the penis out of the vagina before coming), but pregnancy is less likely to happen than coming inside of the vagina. Also, sperm die quickly when exposed to the air, so they do not live long after being ejaculated unless they are inside a vagina. It is very unlikely for someone to become pregnant from sperm on their clothing or near their underwater. Most accidental pregnancies happen when someone neglects or forgets to use birth control or uses it incorrectly, or when the intention is to pull out but not making it in time.
Most people learn what they enjoy sexually by exploring what feels good when they touch themselves. As our bodies age and change, so may our desires and techniques. Masturbation can be an integral part of knowing ourselves and what we enjoy, or don’t enjoy, regardless of how young or old. Believe it or not, lots of people masturbate in lots of different ways. If your masturbation routine could use some spicing up, be sure to check out our catalog for ideas of activities and sensations you might like to try. Masturbation is fun, it’s a stress reliever, a boredom basher, a mood enhancer, it can make you a better lover, and it’s good for you!
About Toy Care and Cleaning
If you intend to share toys with someone else, or you plan to use the same toy for vaginal and anal insertion, you can put a condom on the toy. By doing this, you will not need to get up to wash the toy thoroughly before using it again; you can just wrap it in a new condom. This should be done before another person uses it, and before you put it in a vagina after it has been in an anus. Anal bacteria can really wreak havoc on a vagina, so vigilantly try to keep it out of there.
Some vibrators are waterproof and can be cleaned like one might wash a dish, with soap and water. The ones that are not waterproof should never be submerged in water, as this can destroy a motor. They can be cleaned with a rag with soap and water.
Silicone toys can also be cleaned with soap and water, put through the wash cycle of a dishwasher on the top rack, or boiled only if they are 100% silicone. Use only water-based lubricants with silicone toys. Silicone lubricants can break down the surfaces of silicone toys.
Rubber toys, including jelly toys, are porous which gives bacteria the perfect little hidey holes they love for setting up house. Wrapping them in a condom for use is an excellent way to keep them clean. There are also anti-bacterial toy cleaning detergents and wipes available through our catalog. It’s important to read the directions as many of these products require that they be rinsed after wiping.
Skin simulating rubber compounds such as Futurotic Plus, Ultra Flesh, Cyberskin, Soft Skins Plus, UR3, Senso, and Fanta Flesh, just to name a few, are usually semi-porous materials. Therefore, extra care should be taken to clean and rinse them thoroughly between uses. Pat dry and dust them with corn starch to keep them from being sticky and to restore their original delectable skin-like texture.
All toys should be completely rinsed and dried prior to storage to keep them in the best quality possible.